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WHATEVER HAPPENED TO VANDAL RAPTOR? UK tour

Find The Right Words, Leicester : 16th May

The Hovel Session, York: 25th May

Gong Fu Poets, Coxhoe: 31st May

Depresstival Presents..., London: 3rd June

Off Yours!, Leeds: 6th June

Good Shout, Peterborough: 13th June

Supporting Jollyboat, Knaresborough: 22nd June

Brig-Aid Fundraiser, Fruit, Hull: 23rd June

Slam Dunk, Hastings: 28th June

Word Club, Leeds: 29th June

Verse Matters, Sheffield, 5th July

Say Owt @ Deer Shed Festival, 21st July

Say Owt @ Great Yorkshire Fringe, York: 25th July

Working Title, Lancaster, 26th July

Poetry Jam, Durham: 4th October

Wednesday, 22 December 2010

Vandal Raptor

If you thought music dinosaurs meant receding hairlines and 20 minute drum solos then think again because lurking in the undergrowth is a Punk Rock Dino

Encased in a leather jacket as tough as his scaly hide is a prehistoric monster with fire in his reptilian eyes with a burning desire not just for cold meat but also 3 chords played with sharp, razor claws

This is VANDAL RAPTOR who tore up his Latin name in favour of Punk Rock fame.  Spitting since he was an egg other predators aren’t even a factor they’re glad to avoid his sharp teeth, sharp studs and blunt language ‘cos VANDAL RAPTOR is a Jurassic savage

Did you know it was all the talk a few years back when an archaeologist shifted the earth and uncovered a skeleton with a bright, green Mohawk?

The VANDAL RAPTOR was mostly found drinking cheap cider by the side of volcanoes, usually singing along to the hide anthem:  Anarchy in the Cretaceous Period.

The only problem with dinosaurs and music is their tiny forearms make gelling up hair something of a trail.

VANDAL RAPTOR put a safety pin through his tail and started a band called The Tar Pits and would have got radio play if the mainstream radio shows had accepted his angry anthems.  And if radios had existed 65 million years ago.

You think the Damned released the first Punk Rock single?  Nah mate, VANDAL RAPTOR had a hit with Brontosaurus Blitz, and if cartoons were accurate then he’d be chewing on Fred Flintstone’s ribs.

Just like the Exploited sang Punk’s Not Dead, the Dino-Punks will stand up tall and proud and sing Dino-Punk Will Never Become Extinct

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