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TESTT (Durham): April 12th

The New Adelphi (Hull): April 15th

Workshop Theatre (Leeds): April 17th

Hydra Bookshop (Bristol): April 18th

Derby Theatre: April 20th

Harrogate Theatre: April 24-25th

Ovalhouse (London): April 26-28th


London Book Launch at Ovalhouse, April 26th

York Book Launch at All Saints Church, April 29th

Small Fry DIY, Warrington, 2nd May

Spoken Weird, Halifax: 3rd May

Born Lippy, Newcastle 9th May

Shaken In Sheep Town, Skipton: 10th May

Find The Right Words, Leicester : 16th May

Queenie’s Coffee Nights, Huddersfield: 21st May

Gong Fu Poets, Coxhoe: 31st May

Verse Matters, Sheffield: 7th June

Slam Dunk, Hastings: 28th June

Word Club, Leeds: 29th June

Poetry Jam, Durham: 4th October

Wednesday, 22 December 2010

Vandal Raptor

If you thought music dinosaurs meant receding hairlines and 20 minute drum solos then think again because lurking in the undergrowth is a Punk Rock Dino

Encased in a leather jacket as tough as his scaly hide is a prehistoric monster with fire in his reptilian eyes with a burning desire not just for cold meat but also 3 chords played with sharp, razor claws

This is VANDAL RAPTOR who tore up his Latin name in favour of Punk Rock fame.  Spitting since he was an egg other predators aren’t even a factor they’re glad to avoid his sharp teeth, sharp studs and blunt language ‘cos VANDAL RAPTOR is a Jurassic savage

Did you know it was all the talk a few years back when an archaeologist shifted the earth and uncovered a skeleton with a bright, green Mohawk?

The VANDAL RAPTOR was mostly found drinking cheap cider by the side of volcanoes, usually singing along to the hide anthem:  Anarchy in the Cretaceous Period.

The only problem with dinosaurs and music is their tiny forearms make gelling up hair something of a trail.

VANDAL RAPTOR put a safety pin through his tail and started a band called The Tar Pits and would have got radio play if the mainstream radio shows had accepted his angry anthems.  And if radios had existed 65 million years ago.

You think the Damned released the first Punk Rock single?  Nah mate, VANDAL RAPTOR had a hit with Brontosaurus Blitz, and if cartoons were accurate then he’d be chewing on Fred Flintstone’s ribs.

Just like the Exploited sang Punk’s Not Dead, the Dino-Punks will stand up tall and proud and sing Dino-Punk Will Never Become Extinct

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